There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
