Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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