Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
