omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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