have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I'm passing your future prison.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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