I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
