Non-Jews are for practice
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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