He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
