Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
