i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
