That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
i came on her dog
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize