Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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