My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
