More tranny stories later!
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
