Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize