You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
