...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize