I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
