Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Duck Duck Cougar?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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