It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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