dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
