I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
