Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize