oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
