so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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