normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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