do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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