They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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