Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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