singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
