Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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