omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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