Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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