Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize