He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize