I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
