Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
how can u be prego again
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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