Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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