HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Randomize