Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
