But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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