Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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