so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
