There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
