Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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