Fuck appropriateness.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
