hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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