its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
All I want is dick and wine.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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