When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
