Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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