pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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